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Monday, August 29, 2011

NOW THAT YOU HAVE STARTED........

We started this topic some weeks ago about how to make a change in your personal life. Its a very good thing to make a change in your life especially when you know that you need to make the change. You know you are tired of going over the same mistakes , the same failures, the same boring issues that has made your life so boring even to yourself and just like a funny but true statement i heard recently, you are sick and tired of getting sick and tired. isn't that true and yet funny? each time you wake up in the morning or you procrastinate or you fall for that temptation or whatever it is that you wish to stop, each time you fall for it, it gets you so worried and discouraged but i want let you know today that there is hope for you as long as there is life there is hope and the fact that you are reading this right now confirms that.

So, you have made up your mind, you have written down the goals, you have written down the action points or steps, you have noted what to stop and what to start doing. Now what?

Now this is what you have to do to make sure you don't go back into those old ways. 

1. Get a small paper and paste on your bathroom door/mirror atleast thats one place you are guaranteed to enter daily. Write on the small paper a reminder of your new way of life and always read it everytime you go to the bathroom until it becomes part of you. Just a line or two is enough, something just to tell you that you are now a new man or woman. Let it be in other places that you will see it daily.

2. Stick to it. There's a word i saw in a book some years ago and it has stuck to me since then. It is "Stick-to-it-tivness " . Whatever you have decided to stop, stick with that decision and stop the habit. Whatever you have decided to start doing stick to it and always do it. Whatever it is you have decided to learn, don't give up until have mastered the thing, don't stop the training, don't miss a class, don't jump a chapter but stick with it till you achieve your goal.

3. Get an accountability partner. Get a friend or sibling or someone that you know can be as a "check" on you. Someone that can call you to order when you slip back into your old ways. Report yourself to that person anytime you feel "slip up".

4. Anytime you make a mistake and you "fall" pick yourself up and try again, get on that journey again. Get on that road again,don't give up.

5.I know some things maybe very private, I mean some habits you want to stop maybe deeply personal issue but there is always a way to get someone to monitor you. For example you can cut off the source of that thing totally.If for example you keep falling inside a hole, a way out just stop following that path. Follow another path. And if you feel there's no other path then create one.

Don't just give  up and think there's nothing for you to do. There's a always an opportunity for you as long as you are alive.Since you know the changes you are making will improve your life, so make sure you enjoy it, be happy and keep aiming for the life you really want.

Stay Strong.












Saturday, August 20, 2011

"A Better You" Your 7 days program to self-improvement

I have been talking about how to make a change in your life and i came accross this interesting article and i decided to share with you here. Follow the steps and CHANGE NOW.

1. Know your purpose
Are you wandering through life with little direction - hoping that you'll find happiness, health and prosperity? Identify your life purpose or mission statement and you will have your own unique compass that will lead you to your truth north every time.This may seem tricky at first when you see yourself to be in a tight or even dead end. But there's always that little loophole to turn things around and you can make a big difference to yourself.

2. Know your values
What do you value most? Make a list of your top 5 values. Some examples are security, freedom, family, spiritual development, learning. As you set your goals  - check your goals against your values. If the goal doesn't align with any of your top five values - you may want to reconsider it or revise it.The number shouldn't discourage you, instead it should motivate you to do more than you can ever dreamed of.

3. Know your needs
Unmet needs can keep you from living authentically. Take care of yourself. Do you have a need to be acknowledged, to be right, to be in control, to be loved? There are so many people who lived their lives without realizing their dreams and most of them end up being stressed or even depressed for that matter. List your top four needs and get them met before it's too late!

4. Know your passions
You know who you are and what you truly enjoy in life. Obstacles like doubt and lack of enthusiasm will only hinder you, but will not derail your chance to become the person you ought to be. Express yourself and honor the people who has inspired you to become the very person you wanted to be.

5. Live from the inside out
Increase your awareness of your inner wisdom by regularly reflecting in silence. Commune with nature. Breathe deeply to quiet your distracted mind. For most of us city slickers it's hard to even find the peace and quiet we want even in our own home. In my case I often just sit in a dimly lit room and play some classical music. There's sound, yes, but music does soothe the savage beast.

6. Honor your strengths
What are your positive traits? What special talents do you have? List three - if you get stuck, ask those closest to you to help identify these. Are you imaginative, witty, good with your hands? Find ways to express your authentic self through your strengths. You can increase your self-confidence when you can share what you know to others.

7. Serve others
When you live authentically, you may find that you develop an interconnected sense of being. When you are true to who you are, living your purpose and giving of your talents to the world around you, you give back in service what you came to share with others -your spirit - your essence. The rewards for sharing your gift with those close to you is indeed rewarding, much more if it were to be the eyes of a stranger who can appreciate what you have done to them.

Self-improvement is indeed one type of work that is worth it. It shouldn't always be within the confines of an office building, or maybe in the four corners of your own room. The difference lies within ourselves and how much we want to change for the better.

Hope you enjoyed this post? Do something about it today. I mean ACT ON what has been mentioned here. like i always say, stay strong.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

TAKING ACTION.....DO IT NOW....DON'T PROCRASTINATE

Hello Friends like i said in my last post, i want to be treating the points i made in my earlier post one by one,expanding on some crucial points. So follow me as i discuss this very important point about TAKING ACTION,being able to follow through with your decisions and sticking with them till you get the desired result or till you achieve your dream.

Now, after you have resolved to make a certain change in your life, the next thing is to follow up the decision with action. Like my pastor used to say decision determines destiny. I will also add my own, DECISION PLUS ACTION STEPS FULFILLS DESTINY. Its not enough for you to decide, you must also follow through with your decision. Decide on what to do and then go ahead and do it, do not procrastinate.

Let me share a small story from my experience. I recently just moved into my apartment and before i moved in i was always having problems with freedom. i mean sometimes i will want to spend some extra time in the night to pray or do some other personal things but because i was staying with someone i was not free to do such things. i would disturb them. But now that i am in my own apartment alone, ofcourse i am free to do whatever i choose to do. Now part of the things i see myself doing when i was staying with someone now i am doing them. What i had seen myself doing then, i am doing NOW and i am being fulfilled doing them ,knowing i am not disturbing anyone. I have DECIDED on what to do long before now and i am DOING them now. I stay awake to pray and read and do whatever i want to do. I could have still gave one or two excuses of being tired or just procrastinate but i can't do that because i CHOOSE not to.

This are the action steps

1. Decide on what to do
2. Write them down.
3. Put it in a place where you can easily see it to be a reminder.
4. Do it.
5. Follow steps 1-4 again.

5 simple steps you need. You don't have to make it complex or complicated. For example how do you learn anything? By doing the thing. How do you learn bicycle riding? you get a bicycle from a friend or you buy one and you ride. Yes and a very important point. let me warn you, you will fall down,possibly many times.You might make a lot of mistakes, infact you may hurt yourself along the line. But does a baby learning to walk give up and tells her mum that she just can't walk, that she has fallen down many times and so can't try again. NO, CAPITAL NO. You keep at it. Sometimes after you have decided on what to do and when you want to do it, you now discover there are some other steps you need to take before you can actually do what you intend to do. Don't be discouraged do them. As long as you want a change and as long as you have decided on what to do then DO IT. The Bible says a righteous man falls down seven times yet he rises again. So don't give up my friend, STAND UP and TAKE ACTION NOW. Like Nike says, JUST DO IT.

See you again soon. remember stay strong.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

10 STEPS TO MAKE A CHANGE

Hello friends and family (like one popular telecommunication company saying in my country). Its been some weeks i have updated this blog. Thank God i am doing it now. I want to pick up from where i finished the last time.

For the following weeks i will be writing on the sentences i mentioned in my last post, i mean the following ;
When are you going to make that change?
When are you going to take that action?
When are you going to start that training?
When are you going to stand and face that bully?
When are you going to step on the control of your life and get a new life?

I want to talk about How To Make a Change in your life starting from today. Like the popular saying Change is the only constant thing in this world and I want to add mine, change is one of the difficult things to achieve in life and one of the difficult things to stick with.

AN ILLUSTRATION ABOUT CHANGE
I remember back in school days. I attended 2 primary schools and 3 secondary schools. And each time i go start in a new school i always feel very shy and very nervous. I always thought about my old friends in my former school, now i got to make new friends.I have to start learning the "ways and traditions" of this new school. I have to learn the names of teachers and know the time for one subject or the other. It was a new stress for me then. To make it worse still( that was what i thought then), i was made the class captain in 2 of my secondary schools.Now i must learn all this things and i must know different subject teachers, there offices, controlling the classroom and making sure its quiet when no teacher is arround , making sure i go get the teacher for the subject if he or she does not come on time. I sometimes even had to write notes on the chalk board sometimes. Now compare all those "work" to the primary school days when i had just one teacher staying with me in the class all day and i was not the class captain. SO it was an averagely easy life to leave then in primary school but secondary school brought with it some dreaded changes that i just could not avoid. But the good thing is that after getting used to the new life, i saw that there was no difficulty in it after all.

HOW TO MAKE A CHANGE

1. First thing first, agree that change is inevitable.Its not something you can avoid.Its not something you can run away from.And agree that it is doable. Don't see it as a most difficult task.

2. Confront the change. I mean make up your mind that you have to make the change and settle it in your mind that way.

3. Find ways to accept the change. What i mean by that is you have to find a way of living with it. Don't try to run away from it. Don't try to go back to the status quo. You must accept it and grow with it.

4. Don't see it as a bad thing but rather see it as a good thing. Oh yes some changes are bad but in this case i am talking about good changes. Like, stop procrastinating, stop gossiping, stop being lazy, etc.

5. Stop the bad behaviour you want to change. You can stop something by deliberately making concious effort to stop it. It was in my Year 2 in Higher institution that i first heard that and since then i have been living my life with that word. No good thing comes automatically, you have to make concious effort at building it or creating it.

6. Deliberately do something new to enhance the change. Incase of trying to stop a bad habit like procastination, deliberately stand up to do what you are in the habit of  always postponing. Don't postpone it again. Do it then and there.

7. See yourself accomplishing the change you desire. This is very good. See yourself doing the things you thought you could not do before. See yourself accomplishing it. It is the way you see yourself that others and even circumstances will see you.

8. Reward yourself or motivate yourself. For example, if you are someone that wakes up late always and you get to work late, set your alarm to wake up about an hour earlier and when you get up and get to work early, reward yourself for it. Do something to make you happy.

9. Put up blocks to stop you from going back to your old ways. Don't ever look back. Don't ever think or talk about your "old" ways. Avoid anything that will make you to go back to the old ways.

10. Pray to God about it.Ask God to help you make the neccesary change you desire.

There they are 10 steps to make a change. Read those steps again and apply them. I will talk about taking action next week. Remember to stay strong.